I did not have nearly as hard a time as you are having but I agree with getting in the tub with them. That is what I did for months. Then I started sitting on the edge of the tub but I let him pull me back in. Then he stopped pulling me in so I stayed in regular clothes sitting on the edge with my feet in the water. Then sitting on the edge with my feet outside. The worst transition came next, kneeling next to the tub. Finally I got one of those gardening pads and it was much better. My son is seven now and we can sit outside in the hall and even scoot into the bedroom as long as we can hear him if he calls. He will stay in the tub and play for an hour. Oh one other thing, we didn't really fuss about soap. There was a lot more rinsing than soap and some days we would agree to only soap his feet or his shoulders. Bath time took FOREVER back then but as long as I stayed calm we got through. I was worried I would have the same problems with Bella because she was wildly resistant too. Then one day she peeked in while her brother was in the tub and DID NOT take off. So into the tub she went. We took baths together for about four months now she climbs in all by herself. The important thing I learned was to let my kiddos control the length. If they want out and we have only rinsed or not washed their hair or only soaped the left side, fine - out we come.

You might also try filling the tub to wash your little guys hands. Both of you could just sit on the floor next to the tub and throw thing in or blow bubbles. We have a bubble machine that I use to turn on in the bathroom which was a big hit. Also meant I cleaned the bathroom but so always need encouragement to do that.... Hope this helps. Try to remember that he is going to get dirty about five seconds after he gets clean so you will have plenty of chances to figure this out..

You're absolutely going through a tough time, I'm so sorry. Its far fetched, but have you tried to put on a bathing suit and buying him bath toys (i.e., draw and splash water markers, rubber ducks / cars, etc.,) and encouraging him to get in the tub with you? If it works, you can then try sneaking out when he isn't paying attention.

Let's brainstorm! My 8 year old hates showers. He kicks and screams and cries until he vomits too so I get it.

Have you tried showers? My little man doesn't mind showers because he doesn't have to sit in the water. Or maybe even "sponge" type baths in the bathtub with no water filling up?? He may be cold but hopefully he won't be scared... Good luck!!

When our son was diagnosed, the doc said that fear is primal and may have no basis for him. Our son is often unable to say why he is afraid of something. He responds well to literal and straight foreword explanations, which often gets us past it. It sounds like your son is scared, but as others said, this could be a sensory situation as well. It may be worth seeking input from a peds OT for desensitization techniques. They have techniques I would have never thought of.

I have 4 kids each one is different and learns differently. New and old methods all alike. I kinda found something new out about my 1 year old... And the topic is somewhat related... All summer he has been afraid to go into the beach water and we couldn't figure out why, he loves bath time and playing in water. So just yesterday, I figured maybe he is afraid of slipping and falling in this "big" lake, so I left his sandals on him and he walked right in! No screaming, no crying, and no hesitation. None of my other children has ever been afraid not even my step son who is on the spectrum. So yes KrestaCall, I'm still figuring things out too. Good luck!!!