Adolescence can be trying for children and their parents. A diagnosis on the autism spectrum compounds the journey and makes it more complex, to say the least. To think about a future of surging hormones, as many parents in the autism community do, can be very scary. I would certainly encourage you to think in a more positive and developmentally oriented way. In our psychology practice, there have been a lot of questions about sexuality and children with autism and other special needs who are reaching puberty. Quickly enough, as parents, we feel a part of ourselves back in that intense and sometimes scary world of our own teens. The other part with our child in the current world who is more vulnerable if that child has special needs. Some of that fear is a worry about regression as well as the fear of sexual abuse which runs deep in the special needs community. All the more reason not to put off sexuality and sex education.

Children and teens with special needs are sexual beings just like the rest of us. Respecting each child's dignity, teaching healthy attitudes and expression, while maintaining safety is the job of all parents as well as teachers, and healthcare professional, whether a child has a disability or not. Finally, on the issue of regression, there is reason for concern, but not panic. A recent longitudinal study on Autism after Adolescence; Population-based 13- to 22-year Follow-up Study of 120 Individuals with Autism Diagnosed in Childhood” in the Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders (June 2005) reports that 17% of the 108 examined had a clear set-back in puberty and half of these recovered from that regression. In addition this study confirmed previous research indicating that childhood IQ-level was positively correlated with a better outcome in adulthood as well as language development.

From this information, it is reasonable to conclude that a child with Asperger syndrome or High Functioning Autism can learn to cope with the trials and tribulations of puberty and adolescence. Your son will have many questions, it is important for you and his father to be tuned in to what he might be asking for. There are plenty of teachable moments in every day life. Indeed for the conscious and aware parent, more often than not, children teach us as much or more than we teach them. There is no shame in educating or reeducating ourselves to be equal to the task. I would encourage you to consult with your child’s pediatrician for referrals if more specialized help is needed from a child psychiatrist or psychologist.

From Dr. Cindy

http://spiritofautism.org/2011/09/01/autism-pub...

I'm actually afraid to post this because I think people are going to freak-out. But a big problem we had around this time was that my son was constantly touching his privates. So we decided to tackle a "private time" program where he could request time alone in his room... which was the only place he was allowed to touch himself. He really enjoyed being by himself. And after he learned how to masturbate, his anxiety decreased considerable. And he quit touching himself in public (almost). Please everyone... don't hurt me.

@A MyAutismTeam Member thank you so much for posting that study. That's exactly what i was looking for! My son wasn't diagnosed until he was 13. Up to age 12, he seemd "normal" but had some quirks, like all kids do. Once puberty hit, he became very symptomatic which prompted the testing. He because verbally and physically aggressive and violent towards me and himself. It got to the point where 911 was called and after 8 hours in the ER, he was transported to an inpatient facility. Worse night of my life but they did help him and he got significantly better. Now, after 6 months and a few growth spurts, he is starting to have outbursts again. He went from being an honor roll student to straight Ds, refusing to go to school, refusing to do homework... I've heard that puberty does magnify the issues and i'm finding out through this site that this isn't uncommon. Unfortunately, with hormone changes and growth the meds probably need to be monitored more closely and changed more often.

Mentioned Users

A MyAutis...

My son is 16 and he too had the pimples and awkwardness that comes with puberty. We had the sex talk and even took it into body changes, masturbation (uncomfortable but necessary), unwanted advances (both way, him approaching girls, girls approaching him). We left every topic open and answered questions directly but when push came to shove the withdrawal issues were surrounding the acne, facial hair, and lack of knowing what styles were current and the ability to at least resemble the other high school kids. First I scheduled an appointment with the dermatologist and we developed a skin regiment that he is able to maintain and I use prescription medicine to get it under control. Second, found an electric razor he is comfortable using and taught him how to use it safely and effectively (No using on the head and keeping side burns even). Finally, I sat in the school parking lot and analyzed what the kids were wearing and I went shopping. I bought four different types of jeans and 10 t-shirts that were stylish but within my sons comfort zone. He tried them on at home and found what worked for him and what didn't. After I had a style template that he was comfortable with but also fit in with what his class mates were wearing, he become more confident in his appearance and less negative about school and social events. I see kids in his "program" showing up with lousy haircuts, bad skin, and poorly dressed because it really does take an enormous effort to deal with the Sensory Integration but it was well worth every minute I spent returning items, or trying new acne medicine, and believe me 5 electric razors before I found one that didn't make him anxious with the noise and vibration. In the end my son has a closet full of in style current clothes, clear skin, and even side burns....he goes to school or events feeling like he belongs....I do not want to diminish the "TALK" it is necessary and vital but like all of us..a lot of times the unsociable attitude comes from the awareness that they don't quite fit in. If you look the part you are comfortable playing the part....

I don't understand why you were reluctant to post that. I think what you did was perfect. I've never been a teenage boy, but it's my understanding that masturbating is a phase all boys go through. They discover a new function for their penis; and, hey it feels good too. I think conveying the importance of when it and where it might be okay to do so is key. Almost as much as when and where it is not okay. Stressing too that as far as a topic of conversation, that too is better kept private as well. My son is 12 1/2 now and just discovered what happens when you play with it too much. I don't want him to feel like he's weird or naughty, it's natural. All boys about that age have or will be going through the exact same thing.
My husband is less open about the subject. He'd be more apt to scold him for it rather than explaining what is happening and why. So it looks like, "The Talk" will be up to be with both of my boys. lol

I found a book that explains puberty in both boys and girls in a way that's simple and easy to understand. It has cartoon like illustrations, but is geared for kids just that age. It's part of a series. There is also one on where do babies come from, etc. which we'll tackle down the road a bit. One on marriage, dealing with the loss of a loved one etc. They're awesome!

Good luck to all of us whose children are at that age. As if facing the kids who turn bully and down right mean in Jr. High was not challenging enough! Top it with an erection, or menstruation cycles, great!