Well, this is a difficult situation for all parties involved, you the other tenants and the landlord.

While it isn't your fault that your child, can at times, be disruptive, whether it is related to a disability or not, other tenants do have rights as well. And as a previous Property Manager for an apartment complex, I can certainly say that it is not unheard of that people are evicted for too many noise complaints.

The thing you have to understand here is how those around you may feel during these situations. As a person with Asperger's caring for a child with Asperger's but also as a person in general and a previous manager, I can see all sides of the situation.

You have to understand that no one is under any obligation to "care" about your situation. Although, it would certainly be nice if everyone did... Sadly, a lot of people believe parents use Autism as a diagnosis to describe their "rotten, spoiled children" downplaying the actual struggle of raising a child with autism. But without any sort of attachment to your child, their behavior is just disruptive. As a parent, you're obligated to attempt everything possible to prevent disruptions when you can - but we BOTH know that isn't as easy as others like to say it is (those not caring for a child with Autism and meltdowns). As a landlord, they want peace between all residents and want to ensure that all residents are happy, safe and comfortable... which is hard to do in your current situation, the resolution in the end will likely upset someone.

I am not saying that she should always be forced to leave the house, in fact the opposite. But sometimes it is about common courtesy. When my first child was a newborn, and he would scream in the middle of the night (he was a bit colicky for a short duration) I'd leave the apartment and take him for a stroller ride or car ride until he settled back down... I lived in an apartment with people above, below and on both sides of me. So I felt like it was the right thing to do for my neighbors.

If the guy is being a total jerk about it, that makes the situation more difficult. Because often they are unwilling to come to some sort of understanding.

I would hope that you would not have to move. That is such a burden and inconvenience to you and your family. But if it comes to that, know that you may be able to work something out that doesn't hurt you or your credit. You certainly don't need the added stress of a landlord and fellow tenant trying to make your life more stressful than it already is. So trying to mend the situation and create a dialogue between you, the other tenant and your landlord is vital to everyone's happiness.

Unfortunately, if the man living upstairs from you is "one of those" types of people, the situation can get worse. I've seen this time and time again. So I am hoping that perhaps by talking to him on your own, he may be able to see reason and form some sort of understanding. When people are angry they are rarely able to listen to reason or explanations. Which is why it's better to approach him when he's not currently upset about the situation.

If your daughter isn't making a lot of noise during the night, which I blindly assumed because this tends to be when most complaints are made, then he has a severe lack of tolerance (unless he works night shifts??). And the apartment has a severe lack of insulation. Which is always something I've hated about apartments! Especially multi-story buildings!!!

But there is the old adage: You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.

You're certainly not a bad tenant and not a bad mother. A bad tenant wouldn't have cared enough to even ask for suggestions! I hope this all works out for you.

ALSO: I would certainly try to find ways to calm her down outside of forcing her to leave your home. Working with her ABA is a great start. But also watching for what triggers her meltdowns and screaming and try to redirect her before it ever occurs. Work constantly with trying to get her to use "indoor" voices... not as easy as it sounds but with a lot of patience, it is possible.

Good luck to you. I hope this all works out.

I'd also contact local disability rights advocates and see what they say on this. Times have changed and it's been about 11 years since I've worked in the Property business (I worked in Las Vegas, NV) so there may or may not be protection for this.

First, I'd try to be as polite as possible and approach the neighbor on your own accord and attempt to explain the situation and apologize for the disruption. I'd have a backup plan in place, especially for the night hours when it would be even more bothersome to those around you (for example, take them on a car ride until things have settled down). I'd also speak to the property's landlord and explain the situation, but not from a "victim" standpoint. You're more likely to get a better outcome if you come at as factual as possible without too much emotion invested in it. In other words, don't make yourself out to be helpless, but instead work something out with them if possible. This is my son, he has autism. The noise seems to be causing a problem. What can I do?

If you live in a larger apartment building, perhaps they can relocate you to another apartment where there are families on all sides of you. (I tended to do this by default when a new family moved in and would try to place them in an apartment closer to kids their children's age) if that fails, you can talk to them about breaking your lease without consequence once a more suitable home placement for your family is available. If they understand your child can be disruptive at times they may likely consider this as an option.

While you cannot be evicted because of your child's disability, you can potentially be evicted for repeated noise violation and failure to resolve it, especially if there is a written clause in your contract. But that can lead to a media nightmare if a local news station gets wind of it.

Also I can't move for another year when our lease is up. Don't have the income to break the lease.