It has been said that autism either makes a marriage stronger because you have to work as a team, or it tears it apart because of the stress and pressure. I am fortunate to be the former but I know of the later. Hopefully he comes around.

I am not excusing his behavior but I will say men tend to deal with things such as autism differently than women. For the most part it takes men much longer to accept that their child, especially a son is different and always will be.

With that being said, I am very much involved in both of my children's care. I do not go to all of the appointments though because I work and the sole provider. I do take time off for the more important appointments. I will say going to appointments and behavior are two different things though. He may come around with time and acceptance but I would make it clear that things need to change. Have him talk to other ASD dads it might help him understand.

I'm sorry to hear about this. I am going through this myself with my children's dad. We aren't married but we are together. He won't do anything to help with appointments, educating himself about our children's disorders. He's not even remotely emotionally supportive & hasn't been since our oldest son's diagnosis in 2012. If I tell him about things that are happening I don't think he listens. The his response is we'll take care of it. Even if it needs to happen the next day and doesn't lift a finger to help. Not with homework, schools. If he wasn't my kids dad I would have 86ed his a** a long time ago. So in a way I hear you. Although I have no worries about him yelling but because he doesn't understand where our kids are at he just isn't as aware of the boys and their needs. My children and I survived 7 months of ABA therapy and he wouldn't learn any of it & was counter productive to the therapy process.... Again I'm sorry that y'all are going through this!! When I make decisions I always have my best interest at heart. If it isn't good for my kids I leave and that even applies to family. I haven't left their dad, I just really lowered my expectations in him a lot and if he asks about something I answer. I occasionally I encourage him to spend more time with him & I try to call attention to the things he does right & try my best to forgive & forget. We love him but these diagnoses are threating his ego I think. Rely on you! God bless...

My husband still hasn't accepted our son's autism diagnosis. Like others have previously stated, men seem to have a harder time accepting. My advice, go to marriage therapy, or a marriage retreat through a church before you think of divorce. Good luck.

Assembling my sons puzzles said it perfectly. Only you know if the marriage is worth saving. I have noticed throughout the years that people seem to have to find someone else to blame for their childs disability. I know how difficult all of this is for you. My own family, blood and in laws don't want to understand the difficulties of having a child like Jacob. Take each day at a time, explore the option of family counseling, and most importantly hang in there. Sometimes our husbands require more patience to deal with than our asd kids! :-)