There is a difference between a tantrum and a meltdown. Generally speaking, ASD kids have some control over tantrums, but almost no control over meltdowns (once they start).

Every ABA teacher needs to have a protocol written down for how they will handle meltdowns for each child. Since every child is different, they may not all have the same protocol.

The first step o the protocol is always recognizing that a meltdown is coming. If you can change the energy level, or redirect the trigger, you can avoid a meltdown. The child is always the best person to recognize that a problem is approaching. If they can tell something is going wrong, then the ABA therapist can help them learn to calm themselves.

Once the meltdown starts, it is not longer a teaching moment. You are usually best just to use calm language and a quiet place to ride out the storm and wait for the worst of it to pass. Once the student has an element of control, even if it is something as simple as responding to a question, then you can use that to help them calm themselves.

With us, it is a five step process:

1. Always try to recognize that a meltdown is coming. Help the child deal with any requests that seem confusing or overwhelming. Avoid negative comments. Redirect as needed.

2. Once the meltdown starts, try to lower the energy level. Talk quietly, act calm, be reassuring, and ask the child to calm himself down. Do not reward the meltdown: If a child was trying to get reassurance, make sure they get more when they are calm than when agitated.

3. Avoid physical contact unless it is needed to assure safety. Physical contact, even hugs, can be overwhelming. If the child triggered a meltdown to avoid a task, do not force them to do it, but try to block them from doing anything else. If you can talk them into returning to task, then it might prevent the next meltdown.

4. Separate from the room, find a different place, and encourage the child to walk there under their own power. A safe room is fine, as long as it does not contain rewards.

5. Re-introduce reason as soon as you can. Talk to them and explain that they can take their time, they are not in trouble, and then try to get them to resume "normal" activity under their own power.

This method will not work for everyone, but we have had good luck with it. Even if your procedures are completely different, make sure that the teacher knows what to do, and that the procedures at home are the same as in class.

Basically what you have done is given your child the escape or "out" she was seeking, undermining the process of what the ABA session needs to show the child they will not be able to use unpleasant behaviors to escape. Like someone else said previous, the therapist should have the list of behaviors and how to address the, and you should be doing the same outside of session in everyday life. It's hard at first, but your child (and you) will benefit in the long run!

i wanted to thanks for all the useful input ,when i am not sure on something i use this site to reach out to get others in my same position for there opioions. so thanks

I agree with everyone else here although I do draw the line at the child injuring them self. I would not give up on what you were trying to do I would break it down into steps that will bring about the result you want. If you are heading down the bad road again pull back a little and give the child a break, but go back to it so they know they are not just getting their way

Part of ABA is letting the client have a tantrum/meltdown..they have to learn that that behavior/s will NOT get them what they want. As hard and heartbreaking as it is, giving in is not helping anyone. If the behaviors are repeating, then you need to talk to your team and ask what they think the function is, what they are they are trying to teach her/him to do instead, and how they are instructing that replacement skills so your child no longer go to's tantrums and self-harm to get what they want. hang in there, have the conversations calmly, schedule a time when some one else is taking care of your child.