Hello @A MyAutismTeam Member ... I've added you to my team. Will your son view some videos on YouTube? These have been so helpful for me to view with my son (age13) and given us many, many hours of discussion that gives my son words to express his feelings - which strengthens our relationship because he knows I am his advocate to helping him succeed in a world that often misunderstands him.

First I'd pray - asking for Wisdom. I realize my son is younger (13) but I believe this may work for you and your son - or he may just view on his own. What this does is give answers from experts other than mom who have cutting scientific proof and credentials and tools to explain the giftedness that is within your son = Hope. A Basic need we all desire is who am I, where do I belong and what is my purpose in life = which gives us the needed respect and fulfillment in life. The following have been impactful for us... I have posted these before...

1. http://www.cbs.com/shows/60_minutes/video/21588...
(FIRST PART IS STEVE JOBS/ASPERGERS) (2ND PART IS IPAD APPS FOR AUTISM)
At approx 39:35 min into the video is a cool new research study by Dr, Walter Schneider, Sr Scientist Professor of Neurosurgery, Psychology & Radiology mapping out the brain of Dr. Temple Grandin using a High Fiber Tracking machine. You can visually see the Aspergers brain compared to a NT (Neurotypical) brain or non-autistic brain.

2. Dr. Temple Grandin on TED TV meeting. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fn_9f5x0f1Q

3. John Elder Robison (not diagnosed until age 39) was the inventor of the pyrotechnical (fireworks guitar) with the band called KISS, invented 1st talking electronics games for Milton Bradley, one of only 20 four-star service agents for Robert Bosch GmbH of Germany (the world's largest supplier of automotive components).

Ingenious Minds: John E. Robison - PART 1 of 2
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?feature=related&am...

Ingenious Minds: John E. Robison - PART 2 of 2
http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=relmfu&v...

4. Clay Marzo - Surfer with Aspergers - Seems to Work for Him narrated by Mike Lee
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mMLSFVuZQE

5. Dr. Tony Attwood
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKRIRZEV4B4

6. David Jordan http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?feature=related&am...

7. The Positive Traits of Aspergers
http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=related&...

I know this is a difficult age when all they see is the now and have believed in untruths about themselves or are just afraid to face their fear. But I have also seen mountains moved by faith - namely my 2nd born at age 25 and so angry with us, her parents, who only desire the best for her. I will be praying for a teachable heart for your son.

Mentioned Users

A MyAutis...

It's really hard sometimes to move past the stigma of Autism/Asperger's. A diagnosis brings up a lot of issues, because we are fearful of how the world will treat us due to those stigmas. Many parents make common mistakes when their young children are diagnosed with Autism, basically treating it like it's a bad thing. This makes the Autistic child feel isolated as if their Autism is a misfortune and makes them less than someone without Autism. For those diagnosed with High Functioning Autism, a diagnosis can be something they would rather not have, because their peers will make fun of them, because they grew up thinking Autism was a mental deficiency. For me being diagnosed with Autism was a blessing. it explained so many things that I wasn't understanding in the world around me so that I had the opportunity to figure out myself and my approach better. What I think parents need to focus on with their kids (especially older ones) who are diagnosed, is that we have our differences just like anyone else....those differences can make us not fit in, but knowing about them makes it easier to understand....But when it counts, our Autism gives us extra abilities to do things that others can't without it. Be it an extra fast ability to do math, poetry, music, visual art....whatever it is that we do well, we do it a bajillion times better than an average person. So my point is that at 17 being diagnosed is hard, because we are taught by society to look at Autism for all of it's negative parts and equate it to being slow or disadvantaged or the word I absolutely hate but is used a lot by teens "Retarded". All these untrue things make it something to be afraid of in a young boy's mind, but when you pick it apart, you see that Autism/Asperger's is a beautiful gift that made me in my case have a way of expressing myself that I probably would have never attacked as passionately without my Autism/Asperger's. It doesn't make us abnormal...it just explains our approach to life.

I probably could have said that in about 3 sentences, but I tend to have to find every way possible to make my point clear.

www.thestrangekind.com

They are usually brilliant at whatever they are passionate about. My son was diagnosed very young (about 5 or 6) but we didn't talk about it. We waited until he was older and needed to understand why he was different. Obviously, your son is high functioning or he wouldn't fight the label. Even within Aspergers there is a spectrum of abilities and impact. Your son doesn't have to announce he's aspie to anyone, but sometimes, it helps to understand why he may have trouble relating to others, etc.
Made4Greatness--loved your feedback.
I think your son will mature and accept it as he gets older. My son is 19 and we talk about it now more than we ever have because he is in college and has to advocate for himself.

1. First is time-it takes a while to accept something like that.
2. Good psychologist-get a referral as not all are created equal. They can do wonders.
3. In small steps discuss it but make sure they know that Aspergers brings STRENGTHS and challenges. Many of the world's greatest gifts were from Aspies! Looking at the world a little differently is harder but does pay off!
4. I find 5 star Asperger books (Future Horizons or Amazon)-and we read them outloud(both of us on our kindle). Just a chapter here and there-no big deal. Doing it together offers opportunities to talk about things that are said. Yes, he doesn't like to do this, but he is learning a lot about himself that will help him.
5. I am glad he knows-a lot of people try to keep it a secret and then the child or young adult is always wondering why THEY are different. Except for the very most high functioning child that has few challenges, I see telling them (in an appropriate way) critical to overcoming their challenges.

My son was telling me the other day about a kid on one of his anime chat sites who was complaining about being an Aspie, and my son actually told him to "grow up" and repeated to him all the positives about the diagnosis that I had shared with him throughout his life. I have always positioned his diagnosis as "a gift" that gives him skills that typical people don't have. This is one situation where that rote memory and echolalia came in very handy :)