When Angel was in public school she would not cooperate in any way with getting ready. She was about this age. The treatment team told me to put everything (clothes, toothbrush, hairbrush, even shoes) in a paper bag and bring it to school with her. They were right, about 3 days of showing up to school with yuckky hair, sleep in her eyes and no shoes and like a miracle she knew how to get dressed. I also gave a verbal count down: when the big hand gets here, you have to eat. When it gets here, we have to leave, so that she could see it coming. Once she had decided to cooperate, the count down helped.

My 4yr old will put up a fuss when asked to do certain tasks. With him I've found a couple things useful: Give a choice between activities that accomplish the same result (ie. Goal= Tooth brushing. "Do you want to use your Cars or Peanuts toothbrush to clean your teeth?"). We also use a 'happy face' board which rewards good behavior (usually a quiet mouth/calm body at restaurants or extended periods of independent play at home). I've slowly been introducing chores, which I call 'projects'. I set his underwear on the bed and it's his responsibility to put it into the drawer. At first I had to remind him to do it, and now he just does it. The same thing with placing his dinner plate on the kitchen counter when he is done eating. As for the tooth brushing, I let my son do it first on his own and then I sneak in to 'help rinse' his teeth. This way he has the sense of doing things on his own, but we still avoid 'death breath' and cavities!

Alex doesnt have gut issues , he did at 3 due to diet but he has a well rounded diet now, he actually goes 2=3 times a day on his own without any meds.

/*sonrisemom........... i wasnt upset with him for putting his shirt backwards

Alot of kids on the Autism spectrum will not have the motivation to eat or dress themselves often and maybe dad actually did the best he could. The key to increasing indpendence is taking the time to observe your child 1 to 1 and take notes on what motivates him, what his likes and dislikes are etc... determine his favorite colors etc.... I got my son the right color shirts and now that he has what he likes, he dresses himself independently because he is motivated to. It's all about determining your child's motivations and using them to your advantage. If he likes thunderstorms, get a shirt with a thunderbolt on it. If he obsesses about Christmas trees, use that! Always, celebrate every independent attempt that he makes with great fanfare! Don't ever get upset about minor things like putting a shirt on backwards which will happen at times. Believe your child can do this 100% independently and give him opportunities to try in a way that he will never fail and you will always be pleased. That is how my son went from not doing any self help skills to being potty trained during the day and dressing himself independently 75% of the time. I have a story about that on my Facebook page from yesterday called, "Why I like Joshua's turtleneck shirt" I think that would really be helpful. http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Joshua-Vesely-...